Flatulence Speaks Louder Than Words

Have you ever, for just a brief moment, forgotten where you were and burped really loudly or even worse….pooted?!? Probably not. I bet I’m the only person who’s forgotten where they were and purposefully passed gas. I’ll never forget it as long as I live. I was at our son’s soccer game. I was sitting mostly with really close friends. There were a few others sitting with us who were people we had met at the sports complex. People we had to see on a regular basis. We were laughing, and talking like always, when all of the sudden I felt a little rumbly in my tummy. I suppose I drifted off for a brief moment, and all I could think about was getting some relief, and that’s when it happened. 

I’m not really sure what I was thinking, but obviously I had wandered off into my own little, gas filled world. I was sitting on a blanket Indian style. There were people all around me, but for that brief moment, clearly, for some strange reason, in my mind I was all alone. I leaned a little to one side. I know you’ve seen people do this when they “let one”. Apparently leaning builds momentum, and makes for a more clear sounding, loud poot. And just as pretty (or not so) as you please, I pooted! Right there in front of God and everybody! That’s when I realized that not only had I contaminated my own little world! No, no, NO! Clearly, I had contaminated everyone else’s world as well! Y’all, when I looked up and saw the look of horror, and utter shock, not to mention disgust, on my friends’ faces, mortified doesn’t even begin to describe how I was feeling! You could’ve heard a pin drop, and you would’ve thought a turd had dropped! Time seemingly stood still. You know they were in shock because instead of getting up and running from the smell, they sat there staring at me in disbelief, and marinated in it!  Needless to say, my face was blood red, and I was doing some profuse apologizing. That is, after the, what felt like, thirty minutes of roaring laughter subsided.
Have you ever found yourself in a situation that left you so embarrassed you felt you might never live it down? Did you survive it? Of course you did! Ten or twenty years later, no one hardly speaks of my poot incident. The point is, being a little, or a lot embarrassed never killed anyone. So, what’s stopping you from witnessing to someone?

Think about your most embarrassing situation and know that, beyond a shadow of a doubt, nothing could be that painful. Never had an embarrassing situation like mine? Then I suggest you go somewhere in public, strike up a conversation, then fart really loudly. After that, nothing can hold you back! It’s our job as Christians, no matter how uncomfortable we may feel, to witness to people. We encounter people on a daily basis that just might need to hear something as simple as, “hey, we’d love to have you at our church.” If they say no, hike up your leg and let one! That’ll teach ’em to say no to God!
Revelations 12:11 says, “And they have defeated him by the blood of the Lamb and by their testimony. And they did not love their lives so much that they were afraid to die.” Or afraid to poot in front of a crowd :-). Come on people, let’s not let a little embarrassment keep us from sharing the love of Jesus! We’re all full of hot air, let’s put it to good use.

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