Mirror Mirror On The Wall. Why’d You Make Me Bawl?

When I was pregnant with my son Tucker, I gained a lot of weight. Seventy something pounds to be almost exact. I had toxemia really bad so a good majority was fluid.

Pretty early on I was having to see the doctor every two weeks. I remember they had warned me about the weight gain. This was before the toxemia had been diagnosed. Those particular two weeks I tried to watch what I ate so as not to gain weight, and I was so proud of myself! I strutted into that doctors office like a peacock. Stepped on the scales, knowing how good I had been. Imagine the horrified look on my face when the scales revealed I had gained ten pounds in two weeks! Two dang weeks!!

I managed to make it to the room without pitching a hissy fit. I kept telling myself that it would be ok. As soon as I had the baby u would work on losing the weight. As I was getting undressed, about to put on that lovely paper gown, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror. The full length mirror. Something I hadn’t done in a while. It was a sight I wish I’d never seen. I stood there, lip quivering, telling myself to hold it together. I tried as hard as I could, but emotions and hormones took completely over and I was full fledged, bawling like a three year old. I mean, snubbing, losing my breath, slinging snot, the while nine yards.

The doctor I saw that day was older and hard of hearing. Bless his heart, he walked into a sight for sore eyes that day. I had managed to put the gown on and get up on the table but the tears and snot were still flowing. Dr. John asked me what was the matter. I said “I’m ‘snub’ never ‘snub’ going to ‘snub’ lose ‘snub’ all this wei ‘snub’ eight!!!” I guess all the snubbing made it hard to understand, so he asked me again. Again I said,”I’m ‘snub’ never ‘snub’ going to ‘snub’ lose ‘snub’ all this wei ‘snub’ eight!!!”The look on his face was of grave concern, since he didn’t know what I said. But I’ll never forget the look on his nurses face. It was as if she was trying to choke back laughter and tears. Her eyes were wide and her lips were tightly closed, and she sort of nodded and shook her head at the same time. She knew how I felt, but it sure was a funny sight when it was somebody else. At this point Dr. John asked his nurse, “what did she say?” The nurse answered, as she patted my shoulder, “um, she said she’s never going to lose all this weight.” Dr. John sat on his stool, rolled over to me, patted my knee and said ever so gently, “it’s a woman’s prerogative to cry over her weight.” Then he got down to business.

I cried through the whole visit. I dont remember if I was in the stirrups that day, but if I was, I bet they were chuckling behind the sheet. When he finished, I got dressed as quickly as I could (without looking in the mirror) then ran out of the office, still snubbing, with my head down. I often wondered how many people sitting in the waiting room, thought that something horrible had happened to me or my baby.

At the time that was so horrible, but looking back, it is so hilarious that I was crying so badly over ten pounds. I just wish that was all I had to cry about now!

Sometimes we make mountains out of molehills. God’s word says if we only have the faith of a mustard seed we can move mountains. Most of the time, instead of believing we can move the mountain, we sit and stare at the mountain and cry, trying to figure out how to get around it. The whole time, all God sees is a tiny, little molehill that He could move with the tip of His pinky. If only we’d look to Him and trust Him.

He sees over, under and beyond our mountains. He sees more than the here and now. Let’s stop crying over our mountains. Let’s stop trying to get around our mountains and start hiking to the top! Trust God to help you the whole way. He never leaves us.

Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand. Isaiah 41:10. And He can still do that, even if you do gain ten pounds in two weeks! Nothing is too big for God to handle!

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