I remember when I thought I had fallen in love with Steve, my husband. We were not dating, and had barely had a conversation. Back then, Steve had not yet opened his gift of gab. The only way that gift was opened back then was with a little liquid courage, if you know what I mean.
One day Steve showed up at the house as Tucker, who was about a year old, was pitching one heck of a fit. For those of you not raised in the South, that means he was crying at the top of his lungs, and nothing I was doing was helping.
Needless to say, I was getting frustrated. I’m sure I had something really important to do like hang out with friends, or go out. Geez, babies can sure put a damper on your ME time. Anyway, Steve asked if I wanted him to take Tucker, and he did. He picked him up, and calmed him down. It was his gentle, and sweet nature that reeled me in. The tight jeans and mullet didn’t hurt things either! I thought to myself, “He’s the one! Yep. I’m in love!”
You see, my goal was to find my son a good father. I thought if someone loved Tucker as much as I did, then we surely would love each other, and be one big happy family. We both loved Tucker alright, but loving each other wasn’t quite as easy.
Those first couple, or ten years or so of our marriage was anything but fairy tale-like. We definitely cared about each other on some level, but nowhere near enough to sustain a marriage. People, listen and listen good. Children, tight pants and a sweet mullet are not enough to hold a marriage together! What holds a marriage together is true love. And that kind of love, the kind of love that’s binding, and sticky enough to hold two people together for life, can only come from knowing, and understanding the love of our Heavenly Father.
Had it not been for the fact that, ten years into our marriage, Steve and I finally realized that God was the missing component in both our lives, we’d be divorced. Period.
What I thought was love, in the beginning, wasn’t true love, I was filling a position. Even though there were so many red flags, I mean SO MANY red flags, I jumped in with both feet! Getting married just seemed like the next logical step! I mean, shouldn’t it be the next step after you’re pregnant?
Those ten, long years of trying to love each other in our own strength was anything but productive. I’m so glad we finally figured out the correct order for our family. God, husband, wife, then kids.
I’m glad that we finally realized who we were in Christ, and that we figured out what love really is. I’m glad we never truly gave up on each other, and that God has restored our marriage. I’m glad that, even though neither of us consulted God when we first married, when we finally came to Him, He met us right where we were and took us just as we were. He took what was broken and out of shape, and molded it into something pleasing to Him. He’s cool like that!
Never give up! Any situation you have is a situation God can fix. Let’s ask God to keep our motives pure, so that everything we do, we do out of love for Him; not just to fill a position or to satisfy a need. By putting Him first, in ALL areas of our lives, things tend to fall into the right places.
But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33