In the past couple of months, I’ve allowed something to creep into my life that’s beginning to cause much heartache and frustration. I’ve been getting anxious, and even angry at times. Thus far, I’ve refrained from actually using money to fund this habit, but I fear it’s right around the corner. Sometimes I feel as if I’m one step away from the edge, or one step away from a twelve step program. How? How have I allowed something to have control over me like this?!
I’d like to consider myself a rather positive person. I do my best to see the good in most situations, and in all people. I like to see the glass as half full, and the day as partly sunny. But this thorn in my side is now starting to plague me. I find myself being negative, and using the “H” word…. hate. I find myself asking God why?! How did I, a fairly mature Christian, allow this to happen?!
I realize there are always going to be things in our lives that suck. Some things we have no control over. This is one of those things that I’ve sat back and thought to myself “WHY?! I knew better and yet, I chose to do this stupid, stupid thing!”
I know I should make the most of the time God’s given me. That’s not to say that I can’t have fun, or leisurely moments, but it’s possible to allow people or things to take up too much time in our lives. And there are some things of this world that are straight from the pits of hell! And if I’m aware of this, why did I even glance in the direction of this horrible, awful thing?! My glass now seems half empty, and the skies seem partly cloudy. Especially when I’m stuck on a level for a long time! Candy Crush! I hate you!!!!
“Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.” – Ephesians 5:15-17, ESV