Texting. Communication At It’s Funniest

I have a love-hate relationship with autocorrect. I love how it will add apostrophes where they’re (⬅️see! It just did it!) needed, and how it capitalizes things that need capitalizing. What I don’t like is when it changes one of my perfectly nice words to something not so nice! Whenever that happens, it changes the whole meaning and inflection of the statement. And how!

For instance, Sunday mornings are always a tiny bit stressful. I hate being late! Mainly because I like to get there early and socialize, not to mention, eat a donut! Well, Steve obviously likes getting there with mere minutes to spare. Maybe it’s because the 2 (or 6) donuts he eats are all but inhaled. Personally, I prefer chewing. Anyway, he will sit outside, playing Ruzzle, reading, or whatever, until he has five minutes to get ready. We rarely ever leave when I want.

Yesterday, I decided I’d “encourage” him to get ready a tad bit earlier. I sent him a text that said “I want to leave before 8:30 because we have to pick up Josh, and I don’t want to be late because you’re sitting there “ruzzlin’!” After that, I stuck my head out the door and sweetly said, “Steve, if it were me, I’d get ready first, then if I had time to play games, that would be the time.” After all, it’s my job as Steve’s wife to encourage him to be the best he can be. Then I sent a text that was SUPPOSED to say “See if my shirt’s dry before you come in.” However, that’s not what it said at all! It said ” See if my sh*t’s dry before you come in.” That sort of changes the entire tone of the text! Especially after the two warnings of us not being late (because of him!)

Steve said he was thinking, “Dang! She’s serious!” And I was! Just not that serious! When he came in, he brought me my shirt from the dryer. Naturally, I thanked him for his good deed. Then he asked me had I noticed what I’d texted him. I assured him that I had, and that I was serious about not being late. He said “No, the last text you sent. Go back and read it.” So I picked up my phone and read it. I immediate burst out laughing! I mean first of all, even if, for some strange reason, I wanted to know if my poop was dry, I’d check myself!! Second of all, who would put poop in their dryer?! What a mess that would make! Not to mention, it would thwart the purpose of the fabric softener and dryer sheet! Thank you autocorrect for giving me a good laugh on a Sunday morning! I wasn’t even upset that we’d left a couple of minutes later than I’d planned!

From now on, maybe I’ll get up and just say what I need to say, instead of texting someone who’s just a few feet away :-).

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit saps a person’s strength. Proverbs 17:22

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