A few Sundays ago we were having communion at church. I had already been through the line and was back at my seat people watching. I looked across the way, and saw a lady I really needed to talk with. I thought to myself, “I really need to catch her before she leaves. I’ll just run over there quietly, kneel down, and chat with her!” Patience never was a virtue that was on the forefront of my list of virtues. The smartest, most mature thing to have done would’ve been to wait until the end of the service, then go talk with her. However, that could’ve interfered with all the talking I wanted to do, with all the other people I’d seen! So, I stacked up my things (knowing I had stuff scattered everywhere) and made a beeline.
I had her in my sights, and I was on a mission! I wasn’t running, but I was dang near in a full blown power walk! I rounded the corner, grabbed the back of her chair and commence to squatting. Well nearly. As I squatted down, my ankle rolled right out from under me!! Y’all, this was not a pretty sight!
Ladies, some of you will know where I’m coming from. We work hard to make ourselves look as good as possible. We’ll try to find the most flattering clothes, get the most flattering hairstyle, and we’ll suck it in, at the drop of a hat, if we think someone’s looking at us! We’ll even wear things that squeeze in our fat to make us look ten pounds lighter. *Spanx– A garment that fits so tightly, I seriously believe it could cause damage to our internal organs. There’s a tiny part of my brain that knows that the smart thing to do would be just to lose the ten pounds! But anyway, on this particular Sunday, there was no Spanx, so you know that, when I squatted down, that gut I had so graciously been sucking in, was now neatly laid over into my lap.
As my ankle gave way, there was nothing I could do except roll right along with it! I fell backward, and to the side a bit. I’m sure my arms went flying out. I rolled back forward as fast as I could! So fast, in fact, that I ended up with a huge bruise on my knee! Surely I looked like a Weeble wallowing around in such a manner! “Weebles wobble, and they do fall down!” Some of you are old enough to get that reference. Y’all, it was the longest three or four seconds of my life!
My intentions were to pretend like nothing had happened, being that Sidney, the lady I needed to talk with, had not seen the fall. But alas, obviously the man seated in front of her had been watching because, just as I was about to start talking to Sidney, well, it was more like grunting because my knee was hurting so badly, I heard him say, “Geez. That wasn’t even real wine!” The I looked to my right and the couple behind her was laughing hysterically. The nerve of these people! In case they hadn’t noticed, we were partaking of communion! One of the most sacred acts a Christian can partake of!! How rude can you get?! But, I chuckled right along with them, in hopes that laughing with them might possibly save them from the horrible guilt one could possibly experience, when one is so irreverent during such a sacred event. Bless ’em Lord!
Should there be anyone else, reading this blog, who may have witnessed my misfortune, shame on you if you laughed during sacred communion! That’s all I have to say! That being said. Y’all suck it in, and have a tumble free day!
“I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. And the bread that I will give for the life of the world is my flesh.” John 6:51