Spanx For The Soul Keeps The Devil On The Roll!

Our small group has been doing a bible study called The Armor Of God. You know, Ephesians 6:10-19, where it talks about putting on the full armor of God? The belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness….yada, yada, yada? Well, if you don’t know it, get to know it! It’s a very vital part of scripture! Of course, all scripture is vital, even the boring stuff like Numbers :-). Anyway, if you can’t protect yourself,from the schemes of the enemy, then you may as well get in a corner somewhere and curl up in fetal position because your life is going to suck!

This past week we discussed putting on the belt of truth. Or as Priscilla Shirer referred to it, the girdle of truth. The Truth is God’s Word. Truth is not what the world considers to be truth. Truth is not always what makes us popular. Truth is not always what the government deems to be truth. Truth is very often not always easy, but truth is always right! Im going to say this again so it’ll stick in our brains, God’s Word, The Bible, is The Truth! How are we supposed to remotely live right if we don’t have a clue what the bible says?! And ignorance is not an excuse! Believe me, I’ve tried that one! So then, what do we do? We never leave the house without first donning our belt, or girdle, of truth!!!

As women, I’d say, one of our biggest fears is whether or not we look ok. I know if I’m getting ready to go somewhere, I’ll ask Steve if I look ok. And trust me, he’s not one of those husbands who just obediently says “yes honey you look beautiful”.  He straight up tells me, “Yeah, you look ok. That is, if you’re trying to look 10lbs heavier.” :-/. Some women might be offended by that. I, on the other hand, very much appreciate it! Most likely my answer would be , “I am 10 freakin’ pounds heavier! You got a problem with that?!” :-). The old me, on the other hand, might’ve panicked, ran out of the room crying, with my feelings crushed, and strapped on the spanx! Spanx – A piece of nauseatingly tight, elasticky-type clothing  worn to make people, like me, who are not willing to exercise, look a few pounds less chunky. In other words, it’s a facade. We will do just about anything, no matter how painful, for beauty’s sake!

Now, let’s pretend, for just a minute, that we live in a world where everyone waits until they’re married to have sex. (Pfftt! Yeah. Ok. Welcome to Fantast Island!) Now, let’s just say that you’d worn spanx the whole time you’d dated the man who is now your new husband. It’s the first night of your honeymoon and you’re about to consummate your marriage. Oh yeah! The magic is about to happen! But, it ain’t about to happen while wearing spanx! Yep. You’re naked as a jay bird! With all those once hidden rolls now exposed, and jiggling! The look of shock and confusion in your man’s face is certainly not helping! Suddenly you’re feeling extremely vulnerable and self conscious. Well, that’s exactly how you will feel, as a woman of God, if you leave your house without your girdle of truth! You’re going to feel all jiggly, self conscious and vulnerable. You will be a great source of entertainment and folly for the enemy! Listen, your new husband may have been a tad shocked when he first looked at your spanxless body, but let me tell you the enemy will not be confused or shocked! He will take the opportunity and run with it!

So, here’s the plan ladies! Let’s steer clear of the spanx, and just be ourselves rolls and all! We’re beautiful because God created us beautiful! Don’t go nuts now. Every old barn needs a coat of paint every once in a while! But come on y’all! Let’s worry less about the spanx for our rolls and more about the spanx for our souls! God’s truth is spanx for our souls! Yeah baby! Who’s with me? Let’s put on the full armor of God and fight with all the power God’s given us, against the schemes of the devil! The devil is a liar and a butthole and should be treated as such. Spanx for the soul keeps the devil on the roll!!!

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Ephesians 6:10-19
18 And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people. 19 Pray also for me, that whenever I speak, words may be given me so that I will fearlessly make known the mystery of the gospel,

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